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Hansel and Grundrisse

A counter revolutionary tale




Such terrible nightmares Ziggy always had. His worst featured a square, hammer-headed man with a beard and barrel chest that we were later to learn bore an uncanny resemblance to Karlovich Marx who ran the corner betting shop in the shtetl. We were always confused about Marx’s set up because even though he was always very busy, he insisted that he never made a profit since it was against Jewish Law to gamble. And he was always scribbling in his notebooks and singing the ‘internationale’. Ziggy was plunged into nameless dread just passing by.

One day, people in red head scarves began storming his shop insisting on placing a bet on a horse called ‘Grundrisse’. This was going to be the big one, he said, and that if it came in all the rich would have to give their money to the poor. This was very well received all round. He promised extraordinary odds. Both Zig and I were only about three years of age then, but Zig never forgot Karlovich’s huge head. If you go to Highgate cemetery you will see what I mean.

And so time went by, Zig qualified and was serving under Brucke when old man Marx died. But this was not to be the end of it. Bubbalas, you must be familiar with Ziggy’s dictum that mental health is equated with the ability to ‘work, love and play’. However, our original words were: to ‘love, play and work’. This is not an unqualified maybe, this is a true fact.

He was taken off in the early hours of the morning.

When he next appeared, he issued a press release modifying this statement and placing the word work before love and play. Now my kneidlachen*, you may think that this is small potatoes. Not so. And God forbid I should brag, but in those days psychoanalysis and Marxism were neck and neck in the sack race. Alas, now people avoid us at cocktail parties and throw Prozac at us. (by the way, that’s McCarthy’s grandfather in the background with his hand in his pocket). Nu, as I was saying: I believe that their bargaining chip was a threat to publish sections of Zig’s letters to his imaginary psychoanalyst. Specifically, where he wrote: ‘America is a giant, a giant mistake’. And, more dangerously, his one about the Irish: "This is one race of people for whom psychoanalysis is of no use whatsoever".

So a deal was struck and psychoanalysis turned down the sheets for capitalism. We would keep them working and put happiness on the hind tit. In Ziggy’s now famous television interview with Dick Cavett he anounced that : "Evil lies not in society, but in the lazy servant." The dye was cast.

I believe you can catch this interview on youtube.


And so it came to pass. Corporations now pose as pseudo families and workers and managers get treatment to improve their output.


Reddish Zel


*Little dumplings.

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